Oh, The Guilt

This week marks the one-year anniversary of the end of my weight-loss program as Shape magazine's Weight-Loss Diary columnist. Ironically enough, it'll end with a weigh-in, since I have a doctor's appointment scheduled later in the week. Now that I've had a year on my own -- no dietitian, no trainer, no life coach -- it feels like a good time to reflect on what I've learned, and what I still need to learn, about maintaining a healthy weight and living a healthy lifestyle.

 

I've identified five personal challenges that continue to plague me, but I suspect they're the same challenges that frustrate others as well. So, for today and the remainder of the week, I'll be looking a little more closely at these challenges. Today's challenge? Guilt.

 

Of all the obstacles I face, guilt is right up there at the top. Slowly -- slowly -- I'm learning to ease up on myself, but it's been a long, hard road. First up is the universal working-mom-want-to-be-a-good-wife-and-oh,yeah-I'm-supposed-to-have-a-fantastic-clean-home-and-look-great-too kind of guilt. Like many women, I suffer from "I'll just..." syndrome. As in, "I'll just finish writing this" or "I'll just throw in a load of laundry and clean the bathroom." Before you know it, the day's over and guess what? No workout. No healthy lunch. I've suspected it for years, but it turns out there actually are only so many hours in a day.

 

It feels very contrary and wrong for me to put responsibilities -- work, family, home, etc. -- off to concentrate on myself. But there's a reason airlines caution you to put on your own oxygen mask first before taking care of others. What I've learned this year is that when I push my guilt aside and focus on getting in a good workout early in the day and eating right, it improves not only my body, but my state of mind, my work, my interactions with others and the very course of the day itself. Guess what? Everybody benefits when Dara takes care of herself.

 

You might think knowing that would make it easier to push guilt aside. But it doesn't. I don't know if it's my personality or my upbringing, but overcoming my own guilt remains one of my biggest healthy-living challenges. But what's that recovery mantra? The first step is admitting you have a problem. Somehow, knowing that guilt is a challenge for me helps. I've learned to welcome it like an old friend -- "oh, here's the guilt" -- and do what I need to do anyway.  

 

Besides, if I don't make time to work out and eat well, I'll feel guilty about not doing that, too. If the guilt's coming anyway, I might as well be healthy.

 

How about you? Does guilt ever get in the way of your healthy intentions?

Comments

[Sagan]

Happy one-year of being fit and healthy all on your own!

The same things occurred to me about guilt and taking care of yourself. I mean, if doctors worked 24/7, they'd get so exhausted that they wouldn't be able to do their job properly and then they'd also get ill, and who would take care of them? The strong need to take care of themselves, for the reason that then they can take care of the weak!

[Dara Chadwick]

Thanks, Sagan, for the good wishes!